Trying to find some inspiration.

trying to find some inspiration, someone that can always leave a smile on my face no matter what.

but i'm hopeless. i can't believe the one person in my life that made me do soo much better is gone.

he had a big impact in my world, he was'nt like every other boy that

just was there, for entertainment. he was so much different then that. i trusted him with alll my heart, i still do. he was the first boy i completely let out the real me too. i told him everysingle last thing that was going on in my life. but i was tired of living in one big lie, i decided to tell him the truth. the truth wasnt worth losing him over. if i knew all this was gonna happen, i could have just left everything to myself. everything would be so much better.

but now im lost in the tunnel without my shining armor to guide me. he's gone and now alll i have to remember him by are the memories in my head. i believe in the saying everything happens for a reason, but what was the reason for all this.

i know it couldnt be because someone better is gonna come along and save me, 'cause there is no one better then the person that knows the real you.

i cant just start all over with another guy, it wouldnt be the same. why did karma hit me so hard when i didnt even do anything to desearve all this....it sucks. i keep wishing and wishing there was something else for me to do. but it's taking a long time for my wish to come true.

" I said I'd never let you go, and I never did
I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it
If you didn't have this chance then I never did
You'll always find me right there, again "

i can stop thinking about all the things he did for me, all the things he said to me, and how much when he held me in his arms i didnt want him to let go. and how whenever i would hang out with him, we both would be really sad when it was time for me to go.

he was like my bestfriend. but now it's my fault my bestfriends gone.

i would never get tired of talking to him, even when the things he would say would irritate me i stilll would rather only talk to him.

goshh, i miss him so much.

i would be so happy if he just gave me another chance.